, 57 tweets, 15 min read Read on Twitter
The Kardashians Are Witches: a conspiracy thread
1.) This is a CONSPIRACY thread
2.) Nobody is forcing you to read it
3.) These are not my own ideas
4.) Info can easily be googled/youtubed
Okay so I know some people don't believe in witches at all but I personally do because we had them in my culture until at least the early 1900's & I've had an ancestor that's died from witchcraft
Nothing hella crazy but they would go deep into the woods & create poison & would often target big families out of spite because witches were usually women who couldn't conceive
These women would be known for trying to poison children through offering food. Again, I'm only speaking for what I know & it's probably different for others & has probably changed over time. I really don't know anything about witches in general
The Kardashians are an unusual phenomena because they didn't get famous for having talent - they can't sing, act, write, they're not athletic - but they're everywhere & multiply like rats
M.E.E.T. Magazine posted an article that tells of an Armenian witch story, claiming the Kardashians have a black magic past that has lasted many generations
Before I get into the story, let's keep in mind that the Kardashians are Armenian through their late father's side
This story is wild by the way lmao
In 1809, a dark haired woman strode through the deep forests of Armenia. It was raining hard but she was determined. The young woman was named Kekel Kardashian - the great, great, great, great grandmother of Kim, Khloe, Kourtney, & Rob
She was beautiful, but her life was hard. She had her first child at 19. Intent on forging a better future for her child, Kekel sought out the Witch Clan of the Shikahogh Woods
An old painting by Hans Baldung (c. 1480-1545) of the Witch Clan of the Shikahogh Woods
The Witch Clan possessed powerful magick - dark spells & ancient curses that made them enemies of the Armenian State. They practiced their magick deep in the woods, away from the eyes of an increasingly modern & intolerant society
Kekel walked for days & was warned that she should be careful because the witches will demand more of her than she could imagine. Kekel finally arrived at a clearing which led to a mouth of a cave. She could see faint traces of flame cast shadows in the depths
Kekel cried out to the witches that she was seeking a better future for her child & that she was willing to offer anything, even her soul. 4 witches appeared & asked her if she was really willing to offer her soul, & she said yes
Kekel replied that she asks nothing for herself, but to give fame, fortune, & physical beauty to her offspring & future generations of Kardashians & to free them of her toil. The 2nd witch asked if she was sure that's all she wanted & Kekel confirmed
The witches said they would grant her wish if she did the dance of Shikahogh, an ancient dance the witches enjoyed. Kekel said she would if they showed her how. The witches ordered her to stand naked in front of them & she did. They adorned her in preparation for the dance
The witches put a hedgehog on her head & a leopard tail. They ordered her to dance & laughed at her because she was such a horrible dancer. They had taken her dignity for their own amusement & spread gossip around the nation about her terrible dancing
Kekel returned to her village but her family & friends shunned her. She was a complete joke to society. She returned to the darkwoods, isolated & alone, w/ only her kin for company
Yet the witches had given her what she was promised - all her female descendants had received fame, fortune, & physical beauty, but nothing more
Talent, wisdom, & dignity had now been lost to the line of the Kardashian women. They have always had a strange capacity for achieving fame, fortune & physical beauty, but nothing more than that
This article was written in 2012 - remember when Kim got kicked off the stage by Prince in 2016?
Oops it was written in 2015 - but it's still before Prince kicked her off the stage. So this might be a reach, but someone noticed it so I'm going to include it.. Kanye's 'Fade' video had similarities to this story
Tayana Taylor was dancing all crazy half naked in Kanye's video
At the end she's wearing a mask & a cat tail
When Tayana Taylor was asked about the video she gave a weird answer
Getting into the Kardashian curse - it's basically about how the girls suck males of their energy then spit them out
Kim has been around for a long time now & was first noticed as being Paris Hilton's friend
Paris Hilton isn't very relevant anymore, & neither is Ray J, the one Kim made the sex tape with. Then there's the countless amount of men that have went down hill after being in a relationship with the Kardashian girls. Even Tyga is kind of a loser now (no offense) lol
Kylie's take on the Kardashian curse & notice how upset Kim gets when it's mentioned
There's some celebrities like Azealia Banks that admit she practices witchcraft
Erykah Badu claimed that she's a witch
Look at how Kim is looking at Erykah Badu, she looks fascinated
Erykah Badu has an effect on rappers & it seems just like the Kardashians
Weird right?
Bri Luna is a Seattle & Los Angeles based witch. She has over 100,000 followers on Instagram. So when asked who she thinks is the most realistic witch in pop culture, she said Kris Jenner
So I did Google it & I found the infomercial. Check out the butterfly too
Another person brought up how on an episode of #kuwtk that Kim had those candles in her closet, I believe the green ones. It was the episode when Rob was moving in w/ her (I don't remember the episode) but she was adamant about him not being able to use them
This was from Kim's wedding with Kris Humphries #wtf
I get that it is 2 K's for Kim & Kris, but it also looks like a Masonic compass
Kylie is even into crystals
Khloe crystal shopping
Kylie saying she has been talking to the dead
This is so random but look at Kim's reflection ✋
Idk I just feel like this family is super suspect because they do weird shit like this & eat their own placenta
Kim once told Kourtney on #kuwtk that they need "new male energy" & it's weird how the men do always go downhill after messing with them. Kris Humphries, Kanye, Scott, Bruce, Lamar, & even Rob. Who knows how many more..
I watched a good video on how Khloe tried to sacrifice Lamar & that there's certain sacrificial days but it's been taken down. People have even compared the Kardashians to the movie "Get Out" & I'll do a thread on that next
This thread isn't as conclusive as usual but we will continue to see the weird things they do. There's plenty of celebrities that do weird rituals & I imagine the Kardashians are no different & just put on a front like the rest. End of thread
Oh yeah this creeped me out too lol
Yesss guys I'm so stoked u don't even know!! 💕 I'm checking out her website asap I have a few friends that collect crystals
UPDATE: HERE IS MARINA ABRAMOVIC SPIRIT COOKING (I wouldn't suggest watching if you have a weak stomach)
Kim hanging out with Marina Abramovic #wtf
These are the types of parties Marina has
Honestly wtf. Why would Kim hang out with her if she wasn't up to no good also??
Missing some Tweet in this thread?
You can try to force a refresh.

Like this thread? Get email updates or save it to PDF!

Subscribe to Kardashian Facts
Profile picture

Get real-time email alerts when new unrolls are available from this author!

This content may be removed anytime!

Twitter may remove this content at anytime, convert it as a PDF, save and print for later use!

Try unrolling a thread yourself!

how to unroll video

1) Follow Thread Reader App on Twitter so you can easily mention us!

2) Go to a Twitter thread (series of Tweets by the same owner) and mention us with a keyword "unroll" @threadreaderapp unroll

You can practice here first or read more on our help page!

Follow Us on Twitter!

Did Thread Reader help you today?

Support us! We are indie developers!

This site is made by just three indie developers on a laptop doing marketing, support and development! Read more about the story.

Become a Premium Member ($3.00/month or $30.00/year) and get exclusive features!

Become Premium

Too expensive? Make a small donation by buying us coffee ($5) or help with server cost ($10)

Donate via Paypal Become our Patreon

Thank you for your support!