Thread by @CharlotteOU812

A clients guide to tipping your provider.

Gratuity. To tip or not to tip, that is the question.
It’s always a complicated thing right? Anywhere you go in a country like Australia or the UK where tipping is not the done thing how do you know what to do?

How much should you tip in a restaurant or a bar? When should you tip and when shouldn’t you tip? It’s seems a mine field for many.
For countries where gratuity is not a form of etiquette and social custom it can be hard to understand its purpose and the reasoning behind it.

When it comes to tipping a sex worker it seems even more complicated. What if a provider won’t accept your tip? Some won’t. How much should you tip? When should you tip? Before a service or after?
These are all valid questions and I’ll try to help you out.

Firstly you don’t have to tip. It’s not expected in Australia. And I want to assure you sex workers don’t expect it. But let’s just say you WANT to tip. Just for arguments sake. Let’s take a look.

Why would you tip your service provider? I mean paying for sex isn’t cheap right? It’s likely you had to save up for this visit, and even if you didn’t it’s a huge chunk of money. Your provider had a good time right?

They were laughing and joking and moaning....they got PAID and had great sex.
Win, win. Yes?

Yes.
So why would you tip?
Because you want to.
Because it’s a lovely thing to do.
Because like any other service, those who tip will receive BETTER service.

Come on. You can’t be surprised there. Tipping is charming. Tipping says so many things that words cannot.
I’ve really been looking forward to this....
I’ve been counting the days...
I appreciate you seeing me...

Now don’t get defensive if you don’t tip sex workers. This is not me having a go at those who don’t tip.
But it’s likely that you do tip in restaurants, and that may be for many reasons.
For sure waiters do not make as much money as sex workers.

Perhaps you tip waiters because you realise how hard their job is. Anticipating your needs, watching for when you when you may need something else, being endlessly polite, providing you with exactly what you asked for, piping hot.
You’re getting my metaphor right?

Most workers appreciate tips. I know I certainly do. Because I instantly know that my client appreciates me. That my client wants to surprise me, and delight me, with an extra little kick. Generosity IS indicative of care. It’s a very simple concept.

And gifts are lovely too. Gifts are another form of tipping And workers love receiving gifts. BUT as with all gift giving, it’s always better to ask what a worker likes or needs. It can be a minefield. Please ask what your provider likes to receive, as asking shows consideration.

If you’re unsure what to get a provider as a gift?
Cash always works. Always.

Now I have some lovely clients who have never tipped me. I think they are wonderful and I love seeing them. Perhaps it’s their conversation, or their kindness, or their sense of humour.

Don’t panic and think Hey! I’ve never tipped my provider. They probably hate me! Trust me, they don’t. It may never have occurred to you to tip your provider. You may be unsure how to. You may not be able to afford to tip money or gifts. And that’s all fine.

If you’ve seen me and I said I had a great time, I did. If I said I’d see you again. I was telling the truth. Trust me, if you’re not seeing me again. You already know you’re not.

Please don’t think because you haven’t tipped me or any other provider that that makes you a bad client. It doesn’t.
This thread is about tipping, not about hinting for tips and it answers all the questions that even clients who don’t tip might like answered. And that is all.

As I said many of my clients don’t tip me, but sometimes they have brought other things to the booking. Fresh fruit from their garden, perhaps a scratch lottery ticket, sometimes a news article they thought I’d be interested in.
And I was grateful for all these ‘tips’

As you can see, tipping your provider is a way of letting them know you care about them and you’re thinking of them. And why should you always try to convey that?

Because sex is an intimate gesture. It’s a union between two people, and when you arrive there with kindness and generosity in your heart. It will ALWAYS be a better experience.

When and how to tip:
Tip your provider when you pay them. Hand them the correct fee and THEN hand them the tip. Say “this is your tip”

If a provider refuses your tip there may be reasons. They may fear you wish for more services they are unwilling to provide. They may fear you wish to push boundaries and have paid extra to do so.

They may think that you will bring unrealistic expectations to the booking that now they feel obliged to attempt
If a provider refuses say
“I am only here to receive the service we have agreed to I have no expectations of anything else. This is a gift to show my appreciation”

If they still refuse then don’t take offence and move on to the shower. Perhaps when you have proved through your behaviour that you only have their best at heart, a provider will allow you to tip them. Possibly at the end of the booking.

Always be clear that you are giving a tip. Don’t just hand your provider a wad of cash and leave them to work it out that you mean to tip.
A provider doesn’t want to be accused of ripping you off or stealing from you. Be clear in your intent.

What if the service was sub standard and didn’t deserve a tip? Hmmm. My experience is that when a tip is paid at the beginning of the booking, a provider goes above and beyond. Why? Because you’ve shown your consideration, you’re kindness and your gratitude.

And consideration, kindness and gratitude are 3 things that make sex workers VERY VERY horny.

But let’s just say, you paid a tip at the beginning of the booking and it was the worst booking of your life. Awkward, uncomfortable, strange and generally unsatisfactory. That’s a shame. I’m sorry it didn’t work out. Not everyone is a good fit.

I think a great rule of thumb for tipping a provider is to not tip on the first visit (if you are at all concerned about losing your money) but if you want to see a provider again or regularly to then tip them That way you avoid any problems while also treating your usual SW well

Yes of course you can tip afterwards. If it’s been an experience well above your expectations then most certainly tip after an amazing experience, but be sure you still say “This is a tip” to avoid confusion.

As a sex worker if I could give you some advice? If it was me and I was booking a sex worker. I’d tip first. Then if it was really exceptional I’d tip again or I’d tip more the next time. So take that for what you will but as an insider with ‘insider’ knowledge that’s what I’d do

Now, how much to tip. There really can be no hard and fast rule here. I’d hardly consider 10-20% to be a standard. How to qualify generosity? Who can say?

What are you trying to say with your tip?
I’m thinking about you, I care about you, I look forward to seeing you? I like how you always make me feel so great!

A small gratuity seems about right.

Or, I read on Twitter you smashed your car, heard you’ve been sick, lost your bags at the airport, your house was broken into while you were away on tour?

I think this requires a little more generosity, don’t you? Because you understand how hard life can be.

Or, I want you to remember me as the most awesome client EVER?

Well... there are endless possibilities here.

And this goes for every type of sex work. Tip your favourite cam worker, tip a stripper (well of course, but tip them more) send a tip to your favourite clip artist. Tipping is across the board, in sex work it says
I appreciate you. You are worth something to me.

Whatever you want your tip to say, make it personal, make it thoughtful and kind. Make it something that delights your provider, make it a surprise, make it fun.

I tip, because it makes me feel good. Being generous and being kind to others makes me happy.

Don’t feel that you have to be a big spender to leave a tip, even a card is such a thoughtful gesture. The point of any tip is to show you care.

If you haven’t noticed, being a sex worker is kind of hard There are days we get down, get depressed and feel lonely and unappreciated A small tip can make a huge difference to our day, and often to our lives
So on behalf of your provider, I say a heartfelt and sincere
Thank you

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